Rainy Day Update

Alrighty, my second semester has started without a hitch, very optimistic that I'll get back on my feet, Lord willing. My problems with the nerve pain have, for the most part, subsided. I'm back to wearing my prosthetic for an hour or two, trying to build up tolerance to the nerve sensations. I think the focus of this little update is for learning to deal with people. Once again today, I encountered several individuals, who are neither mature, nor intelligent enough to even grasp any value from learning to live with diversity. I pray that they will grow up sometime soon. But I guess it goes to show, there are times people are difficult to deal with. I've always found it that way and much rather prefer the company of my horses. lol. But in all reality, there are people who will help you along the path you walk, and there will be others who, either are roadblocks, or try to knock you off.

Just remember, you never know the impact your words or actions will have on another. A random stranger stopped me two days ago to remind me that God loves me and to smile as he wished me a blessed day. He caught me off guard as I was absorbed in my own world of doubts and uncertainty about school and my finances, but not enough that I couldn't beam a smile and wish him the same blessings. See, right after my accident, I felt a legitimate change come over me, and I could see effects of it on my family as well. All the petty concerns that had seemed so vast and insurmountable, faded into the background and we were able to see what was really important. I had a whole new outlook. I'd followed on the path of the Lord for many years as it was, but this was more. There was a far deeper connection. I mended some relationships that I had let slide and made time for others I always said "tomorrow" to. I let myself forgive the wrongs others had done and was able to move on from issues I'd struggled for years to overcome. They just weren't important anymore.

However, after a few months, I noticed the connection fading from within my family, things were slipping back right where they had started. I couldn't believe it. But reflecting now, I haven't noticed, but the feeling has gone from myself as well. It's saddening. I find myself worried over petty things again, but it's hard not to be when your income is not as steady as it could be, but your expenses are.

Still, I find myself longing for that connection again. In instances today, in which I let my frustrations boil over, it's important to remember that people are people, they make mistakes, and should have a chance to be forgiven. I guess for me, the desire to get life back to normal strains my control when others drag me back. Human curiosity is one thing, but within a set parameter and amount respect. I am typically fine, as long as the questions are respectable and you are not just a sick bastard (forgive, I've no other term to think of).

Anyway, if I can make 5 1/2 weeks of forgiveness, then all will be well. lol. In other news, I am anxiously awaiting the return of Wes. He'll be down again, not this weekend, but the next :)

We'll be celebrating Nick's, Nick J's, and my grandmother's birthdays out on the water. The whole family will be together, including, my sister :) Anyway, it is late, and I have a quiz in the morning for Precalculus, so I will sign off for now.